Such wisdom here from @beccaparsons ! Now that I have young adult kids who are parents themselves, I wonder if these kinds of lessons have to be learned by each of us through experience. How much wisdom can we teach or pass down?
"Even writing this post has taken far longer than it should have done, because my imposter syndrome and perfectionism has driven me to rewrite paragraphs multiple times because “this isn’t any good”. The irony that I am writing about perfectionism is not lost on me." I love this vulnerability!
Also, the photo is so cute!!!
I think for me it has been helpful to realize that things not being perfect doesn't mean I'm "lazy" or somehow failing morally, and that letting things be/doing the bare minimum can actually be a mark of humility.
For imposter syndrome, I really liked Jia Jiang's TED talk on rejection therapy. I think it came up when I was listening to the audiobook of Antifragile by Nassim Taleb (not done yet, it's sooo long and there's always a wait for it at the library). It inspired me to make a little chart of 100 boxes that I tick off every time I fail at something important to me. (Not intentionally... more like when I really tried hard to do something and it still didn't work.) Celebrating failure because it means I'm in the arena trying to do something meaningful. I'm trying to fill up all 100 :)
Thank you for this beautiful and inspiring piece!!!
Yes, I so agree about having to relearn that imperfection doesn’t equal failure or lack of effort…there’s some deep inner work I still need to do in that area. Gradually realising that actually productivity and efficiency aren’t the most important things in life and actually they can often cause us to overlook more important things like human needs and relationship.
I like the sound of that chart! Nassim Taleb is on my “to read” list but quite a long way down 🙈
Yes, thank you Becca. I just got around to reading this post an hour or so after publishing my post which deals with failure. I was totally on the same hamster wheel, trying to perfect a post on failure. We bring our best efforts to the table, but those efforts will rarely, or more likely never, lead to perfection.
I feel like this post was written for me, like a good friend had a window into my life and saw me inwardly berating myself for my first cheesecake not turning out perfect for my daughter's birthday and wrote this to encourage me. It was exactly what I needed to hear/ read. I'm sure a lot of moms need this too. Thank you for all of us.
Becca, I read this when you first published it but am just now finding the time to comment! FIrst, thank you for the shoutout and I am so very glad you're here writing and sharing! Perfectionism is truly such a hindrance to a full and creative and awesome life. It's so tricky because it seems like it's what allows/enables those things (I'm so intentional! I have such high standards!) but it's the opposite. Just like you said: "I’ve actually come to believe that perfectionism is the enemy of anyone seeking to grow in excellence."
Also, perfectionism was one of the very first topics I wrote about on my old blog. My "lead magnet" (barf, hate that term, but IYKYK) was actually a little PDF I made called "10 Mantras For Perfectionists." And "done is better than perfect" was absolutely one of them! ;)
Loved this post so much. Motherhood helps us grow more healthy in so many ways, and it's such a beautiful thing.
Thank you Amber! Perfectionism really does suck lol.
Haha I love a lead magnet, I have definitely made a few in my time for my wedding biz…”50 Questions to ask your wedding venue”, “Common mistakes couples make wedding planning” 😅
Such wisdom here from @beccaparsons ! Now that I have young adult kids who are parents themselves, I wonder if these kinds of lessons have to be learned by each of us through experience. How much wisdom can we teach or pass down?
"Even writing this post has taken far longer than it should have done, because my imposter syndrome and perfectionism has driven me to rewrite paragraphs multiple times because “this isn’t any good”. The irony that I am writing about perfectionism is not lost on me." I love this vulnerability!
Also, the photo is so cute!!!
I think for me it has been helpful to realize that things not being perfect doesn't mean I'm "lazy" or somehow failing morally, and that letting things be/doing the bare minimum can actually be a mark of humility.
For imposter syndrome, I really liked Jia Jiang's TED talk on rejection therapy. I think it came up when I was listening to the audiobook of Antifragile by Nassim Taleb (not done yet, it's sooo long and there's always a wait for it at the library). It inspired me to make a little chart of 100 boxes that I tick off every time I fail at something important to me. (Not intentionally... more like when I really tried hard to do something and it still didn't work.) Celebrating failure because it means I'm in the arena trying to do something meaningful. I'm trying to fill up all 100 :)
Thank you for this beautiful and inspiring piece!!!
Thank you for this lovely comment Catie 🤍
Yes, I so agree about having to relearn that imperfection doesn’t equal failure or lack of effort…there’s some deep inner work I still need to do in that area. Gradually realising that actually productivity and efficiency aren’t the most important things in life and actually they can often cause us to overlook more important things like human needs and relationship.
I like the sound of that chart! Nassim Taleb is on my “to read” list but quite a long way down 🙈
Yes, thank you Becca. I just got around to reading this post an hour or so after publishing my post which deals with failure. I was totally on the same hamster wheel, trying to perfect a post on failure. We bring our best efforts to the table, but those efforts will rarely, or more likely never, lead to perfection.
I feel like this post was written for me, like a good friend had a window into my life and saw me inwardly berating myself for my first cheesecake not turning out perfect for my daughter's birthday and wrote this to encourage me. It was exactly what I needed to hear/ read. I'm sure a lot of moms need this too. Thank you for all of us.
Thank you! I’m so glad this post was an encouragement to you.
Becca, I read this when you first published it but am just now finding the time to comment! FIrst, thank you for the shoutout and I am so very glad you're here writing and sharing! Perfectionism is truly such a hindrance to a full and creative and awesome life. It's so tricky because it seems like it's what allows/enables those things (I'm so intentional! I have such high standards!) but it's the opposite. Just like you said: "I’ve actually come to believe that perfectionism is the enemy of anyone seeking to grow in excellence."
Also, perfectionism was one of the very first topics I wrote about on my old blog. My "lead magnet" (barf, hate that term, but IYKYK) was actually a little PDF I made called "10 Mantras For Perfectionists." And "done is better than perfect" was absolutely one of them! ;)
Loved this post so much. Motherhood helps us grow more healthy in so many ways, and it's such a beautiful thing.
Thank you Amber! Perfectionism really does suck lol.
Haha I love a lead magnet, I have definitely made a few in my time for my wedding biz…”50 Questions to ask your wedding venue”, “Common mistakes couples make wedding planning” 😅
Motherhood helps us grow. Yes. Big yes.
Thank you. I'm still learning about letting go of control, almost 29 years into motherhood with two young children still at home.
Thank you April, so glad you enjoyed this piece.